Childcare Dilemma

Well, I have a job as a Sub in Tempe. I suppose it would be more real if I was actually able to work the job. John's crazy work schedule tied in with Rachel going to school half day is putting me in a bind. There is work for me. I have decline at least 6 placements for today because he is working from 1 to 10 today and there would be no one to watch Rachel and then Jason and Amanda for the balance of the day. Next week, he took off only one day during the week. Friday. Wow, I can really get some good hours in. Why is it when he works, childcare is my responsibility? It is just assumed. Now that it is my turn to be employed, I am the one who has to arrange for it? It is my burden to ensure my children are taken care of. Is it my employment is not as critical as his? I make less money, therefore I am not as deserving? Is it more for him to punish me for wanting to be divorced from him? All I know is I feel my position is diminished. My career needs once again are not important. I realize we are not a couple, but as parents we both should shoulder the burden of their care and well being. Not just me because it has been my responsibility alone for the past 10 years. I have a right to work just as much as he does.